A Plethora of Potential Problems

I was awakened Sunday morning in the usual way.

That is to say, David poked me with Alex’s foot. When I rolled over to see what in the world they might want, David informed me Alex was hungry.

Alex has been starting to self-wean and has only been mildly interested in nursing in the morning lately. Case in point, on Saturday morning he tried to play me like a bongo rather than nurse.

So I was pleasantly surprised when he settled in to eat Sunday morning. When he finished he sat up as he has started doing post-meal. But then, he put his leg onto my tummy and shimmied up on to me.

Aw, how sweet, he’s initiating snuggle time, I thought.

But then he swung his other leg up and over me. And then dropped down onto my other side. And then latched on.

What the hell?

I was extremely creeped out by the fact that Alex had apparently decided it was time for him to switch sides and just….did it.

Not as creeped out as I would be later in the day though.

We’ve got a pretty deep tub in our condo. I’d say it’s about 22 inches deep. By comparison, Alex is about 28 inches tall. He’s gotten to the age where he takes baths in the tub by himself and I kneel over the side to wash him. No more tandem bathing in our house.

So I’m washing him when suddenly he pitches his little yellow fishie over the side of the tub.

Yes, folks, I know it’s a little weird that he’s got a yellow rubber fishie not a yellow rubber ducky but that’s what he’s got. Focus, please.

So, quick as a wink, his little behind stands up and throws his knee up 22 inches or so and tosses that leg over the side of the tub. He lays momentarily still on top of the tub.

He then swings his second leg over and slides down the outside wall of the tub.

What.

The.

[email protected]

I can see a plethora of ways that this is going to come back again and again to bite me in the behind. I’m not joking when I say I’m a little bit terrified that my 9 month old can scale the tub walls.

Really, it was like watching soldiers in basic training scale one of those walls.

Except that my “soldier” was a baby. It was a person who cannot walk yet but can scale walls.

Then I read Funny or Snot’s post and was extremely jealous. A child that needed tips on wall scaling? So desirable.

So yeah. A plethora of potential problems just swam before my eyes.