My diet

When I was younger, I was under the misconception that I could lose 10 lbs. in 3 days. Well, that’s not entirely true. I though that that was probably a lie. But surely I could lose at least 6 lbs in 3 days. Then I could continue to fit into my pants. The diet was […]

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Muhammad Ali Goes to Bed

When I was three, my father banned me from sleeping in his bed. Which meant when I had nightmares, I had to sleep in a sleeping bag on the floor next to their bed. Know where a scary place to be when you’ve just had a nightmare is? On the floor next to the bed. […]

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It Came From the Toilet

Some of you may have seen this previously up at The Fly Chalupa. If so, pretend it’s new to you. Since we’ve had our son, I’ve had ample time to reflect on how differently fathers approach parenting. My husband is great and very hands-on. But he certainly sees things from a different perspective than I […]

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The Asshat is Inside the House

So, I’m an educated person. I do many things well. However, the first time I do something? If it is not explained fully to me, I often do not make basic connections. Because, on occassion, I wear my ass for a hat. For instance, I can probably figure out how to connect the PVC piping […]

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Modes of Transportation: A Bevy of Asshats

I was going to post about this asshat I once knew. In fact, Asshat was our code name for him. But alas, I cannot do that. Please guess why. In lieu of that, a short diatribe on the asshats I encounter daily. Driving Asshats People in Chicago think that they are the only ones driving. […]

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Get a Clue

I was kind of a weird kid. I’m kind of a weird adult but that’s to be expected. Raising a weird kid has to be rather hard on one’s parents. I used to insistently demand cheese pizza. Which my parents would order me. And when I got it? I would be furious. And I would […]

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She’s Got a Ticket to Ride (but I don’t)

I don’t normally carry cash. This is not usually a problem because pretty much everywhere nowadays takes credit cards. I pay the balances off in full, I like to get miles, I don’t have to stop at the ATM. Really, they’re the ultimate convenience for me with no downside. Cause I ain’t paying no stinkin’ […]

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It Was the Best of Times, It was….

A lot has happened. We moved. It’s done. I’ll tell you all about it soon. The important thing is, on Saturday September 4th, David was diagnosed with meningitis. Here is how I knew to take him to the doctor: He woke up, got out of bed and screamed. He sat down and moaned. He laid […]

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Spending and Saving: The Move

So, recently we did this whole moving thing? You may have heard? It was mildly chaotic. And gave me more than a few panic attacks. But I’m glad we did it. For a multitude of reasons. For one, if that whole meningitis thing had happened while we were still in the city, it would have […]

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